Luekimia or blood cancer is not only the white blood cells "eat" the red blood cells as generally in people's mind. Just some knowledge sharing, humans blood contain 3 major cells: white blood cells, red blood cells and platelets and these 3 are generated in the bone marrow. Under normal condition, bone marrow will generate the appropriate ratio of platelets, white and red blood cells. When the bone marrow goes into malfunction, then it will generate unbalanced ratio of platelets, white and red blood cells, hence this is called luekimia or blood cancer.
My this company's ex-employee admitted into hospital on this Monday and declared die today (Friday). My father... hmmm...about a month. Well, for me, if really hopeless already, it will be a blessing to the patient if they die ASAP. It is very difficult for the patient to get through the whole process of medication to counter this decease. Some patient's hair will drop after the chemotherapy, some will keep on vomit, some will keep diarrhea. My father's case keep on diarrhea, hence have to keep on change pampers for him. About 10-20mins you have to change the pampers for him already and it is not an easy task to do so, as the patient already too weak to wake up for the toilet bowl, hence need at least 2 nurses help to do so.
I been helping him to change the pampers for about a month. I don't mind to do for him, but I really mind to see he suffering. In my mouth, I hope he recover faster, but inside my heart, I know it is like striking the lottery to get this decease, and ti will need another striking lottery probability or miracle for him to get cure. Hence, I hope, if god or the fate destiny that he cant recover, just let him be ASAP. Sound cruel, but have to.
Too many words to describe those feeling. But I sincerely thank the incharge doctor and medical team in the Hospital University Malaya to take care of my dad and mum. Although part of the reason my father sudden death is because their careless. For me, 1 month is enough for him to suffer already, I don't wish to see him suffer more even if the medication can last his life longer, but no point for me if I continue see him suffering.
Again, wish every beings in this universe <
Sadhu... Sadhu... Sadhu
5 comments:
Chan goh,
What you thought weren't cruel as I should say. Been there, done the same as you too. When the only thing you can hope for was a miracle, you'd truly hope that the best way is that he'd be taken away from us ASAP.
It's easier said than done.
One thing, my friend, LIFE GOES ON... this is life!
~ birth, old, sick, die ~
The life that we live in is too real, too cruel, and too hurful i would say. At times, looking at the more positive side of this life, would somehow gives us hope or perhaps the strength to go on in life. :)
Kuan Jeh,
Yeah ... LIFE GOES ON, no matter how painful it is, just cherish the present moment and live it with the fullness :)
Joyce,
"looking at the more positive side of this life, would somehow gives us hope or perhaps the strength to go on in life"
Sometime I feel this is a bit crap, just merely an consolation :) For me, it just only like cheating ourself to make ourself feel better :) After all, we still have to carry on the pain and goes on with our life :)
Tru tru, very tru indeed.
We can never forget certain things that had carved deep impact in our lives. We can only keep these as memories; good or bad, we shall decide. But, no matter what's the decision, when we're lonely, when we're down, when we're in deep thought, these memories will eventually playback like it was yesterday.
If you can let go a certain 'memory'; I can boldly say what it has no great impact in your life at all!
So pals, this is life! Like it or not; LIFE GOES ON!
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